| Teen Grief Group |
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Teen Grief Expressive Art Slideshow Coming.
Grief and death are so taboo in our society when in reality they are part of the natural process of the life cycle. It is especially important to allow the grief process to run its true course but frequently that does not happen and the grief is buried. Unresolved grief then shows up in unhealthy ways as aggression, bullying, drug use or sometimes severe violence against self and others. The following article is about how the Expressive Arts can help channel and transform the energy of the grieving process into constructive, creative, and empowering experiences for adolescents. First and foremost, what is needed is the patience to listen, listen, and listen because teens need to tell their stories, as that opportunity has not been afforded to many of them. Then trust the creative process because it is the process that helps teens to move forward! We provide kids with opportunities to nourish all their senses with smells and tastes from various snack foods, a wide range of art materials for tactile input, playing their favorite music for auditory inspiration, photos of loved ones they have lost, a ceremonial candle they have decorated, and visual art to nurture the sense of sight, and last but far from least, the all-purpose comfort of m&ms! Offering nourishment to the senses creates a caring environment where trust can be redeveloped once again or maybe for the first time, and finally an opportunity for group members to share their "true" selves. The "Teen Grief Expressive Arts Group" generally meets for an hour and a half once a week for ten weeks. The term Expressive Arts is used here to describe the inclusion of the visual and the theatre arts in the transformation of grief. One of the healing properties of the arts is to be a sanctuary to hold both the joy beneath the suffering as well as the suffering beneath the joy. When the lives of teenagers are shattered by the loss of loved ones, the Expressive Arts offer a way to rebuild a supportive community and a sense of themselves as worthwhile and gifted human beings! The following are illustrations of some of the visual and theatre arts activities that have had a profound impact on our young friends in their search to find expression for their grief and for their talents. We begin and end our groups by inviting the kids to take turns lighting and blowing out a candle in honor of the loved ones they have lost. They share names and stories of their loved ones by taking turns passing a drum, a physio ball, a stuffed animal, a foam football etc. These rituals help to set the tone and communicate from the very beginning that we place a high value on equal inclusion of everyone's voice.
One of the kids' favorite kinds of painting is called Touch Painting. Touch Painting includes a piece of Plexiglas, creamy and Jell-O-like finger-paints, sparkles in as many colors of the rainbow as possible, multi-colored tissue paper, and any other decorations that spark the imagination! After the trust is built in the group, we introduce the kids to the materials, show an example of what can be made, and offer an open-ended invitation to play with the different colored finger-paints on the Plexiglas and see what emerges. At this stage, open-ended invitations are a sign of respect for the ability of grieving teens to find the inner guidance they need for their healing journey. We play gentle, heart-centered drum music during the Touch Painting to help them relax, breathe, and embark on this adventure into the unknown. Some teenagers find solace in sharing deep anguish as they play with the finger-paints on the Plexiglas. Others are drawn to experimenting and add different colored sparkles and bits of tissue paper to the finger-paints and then put painting paper on top of the design. The adolescents dance their fingers across the top of the painting paper and when they lift the paper off the Plexiglas, a painting reveals itself that miraculously offers a reflection of suffering, love, kindness, rage, forgiveness, prayer, compassion, betrayal, truth, understanding etc. After everyone finishes their work, group members choose to share the stories behind their creations or they choose to pass. Young painters often find giving color, shape, and texture to their feelings is a safe way to lighten their burdens and to make their doubts, fears, and awakenings visible. Once teenagers can actually see their emotions, it is easier to engage them in a creative dialogue. Oftentimes youth are valiantly trying to cope with a flood of anger and rage at not only their losses but also the ignorant reactions around them. Young people who are grieving the loss of a loved one may be more at risk of being bullied and/or bullying others at school. The theatre arts offer innovative ways to help teens acknowledge, accept, and transform their anger and rage by expressing the drama that is living within them in an outer way. Playing games with a limbo stick, silk scarves, hoola hoops, and a velour-covered, stretchy band provides adolescents with ways to have an uplifting experience of their bodies at a time when their bodies are often harboring deep pain. Grieving teens often try to escape the hurt lodged in their bodies through destructive behavior. When adolescents are given simple structures that offer a wide range of emotional and aesthetic expression, they readily take charge of their experience and create games that free tension and open the way for the ecstasy of connecting with themselves and others through creative movement and drama. A touching example of the healing transformation offered by the theatre arts came when we moved outside and the teenagers were offered a choice of green, silk scarves to express the different qualities of rain i.e. a hurricane, a rainstorm, a gentle rain, raindrops, etc. or blue scarves to show the different qualities of wind i.e. a tornado, a windstorm, a gust of wind, a light breeze etc. The teens were asked to choose a scarf to show rain or wind and then to choose a form of rain or wind. The kids were invited to use their scarves to show the movement of their kind of weather as it traveled from one side of the limbo stick to the other side. After a couple of cathartic rounds of exploring the drama of weather, the teenagers began to follow their own inspirations. First they held both colored scarves in each hand and improvised creative ways to go under, over, and around the limbo stick. Then they tied the green and blue scarves together to create butterfly wings. Before our very eyes they emerged from the drama of the extremes of rain and wind to turn into butterflies traversing the limbo stick! There was an unforgettable moment when one youth who had previously experienced her body as a prison, spread her green and blue wings and spontaneously began to spin around and around. The jubilation on her face was a tribute to the great resiliency of her body, heart, and spirit to transform enormous suffering into joy! The "Teen Grief Expressive Arts Group" concludes by celebrating loved ones that have passed on by writing words of love on helium balloons and then releasing them into the sky. We also ice and decorate cakes with candles to remember loved ones and make scrapbooks. Making cards of their art work and writing appreciations of one another on the cards, having an art exhibit, and creating a slideshow of their artwork are all precious ways to validate the creators behind the creations. The expressive arts offer themselves as sources of unconditional love in which grief can be transformed into tangible and intangible affirmations of selfhood and dignity! Maryam Mermey, M.A. Counseling Psychology, M.Ed. Arts in Education, is an Expressive Artist & Trainer who is in her second year of a doctoral program in the Expressive Arts. She can be reached at: This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it or at: 207-458-3357. Peter Comstock, LCPC is a therapist in private practice at 74 Winthrop Street in Augusta, Maine. Peter specializes in work with adolescents and can be reached at his office: 207-621-8048 or on his cell: 207-462-7180. He can also be contacted at: This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it . If you would like to see the slide show of the young artists with their artwork please visit: www.thetransformativearts.com The slide show is under Teen Grief Group. If your agency is interested in offering a "Teen Grief Expressive Arts Group" or a training in the use of the expressive arts in grief work, you may contact Maryam or Peter by phone or email. |
Painting is a wonderful initial activity. At the outset of a group, we tend to make more directed creative invitations such as asking teens to paint how they feel when they miss their loved ones on one side of a spongy, foam sheet and where they find their strength to get up every morning on the other side. Painting crayons, such as Caran D'ache, are crayons that turn into paints when they are dipped into warm water. Caran D'ache have a creamy texture especially when used as paints that enable them to glide across foam sheets or other painting mediums with a grace that many grieving teens find soothing. The way the sheets of soft foam absorb the paints seems to draw kids into a pensive, reflective frame of mind. The teenagers become involved in something larger than their pain i.e. the creative process. They discover emotions that reflect not only deep wounds but also deep understanding.